I have nothing witty to say.

Who?

My name is Amber Heineken, and I go by Bambi. I live in Kansas City. I'm not going to school. I'm eighteen. I have a chair that was in the Japanese movie Mermaid. I'm working at being a tattoo artist, but right now, I sit at a desk all day and answer phones, ride my cruiser, and bake artisan bread.

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Sid: Can you do the upper harmonics in 'The Talk of Indolence'?
Me: You can sing higher than me. Why don't you do it?
Sid: Just get your voice to be really girly.
Me: Babe, I just can't do it.
Sid: Why do I always have to be the girl?!?
(This was in front of about four people, who already think that I give it to Sid up the butt. But Sid is one burly dude with a huge ass beard, and he's covered in tattoos. I'm 5'5", 125 lbs, and I'm pretty womanly. It's great, yet awkward.)

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